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from the makers of James's Webpage comes...
the Customer Survey

1. What is your name?
James
Bob
Yoda
Prince
Wait, my name's not on this list

2. Where do you live?
Earth
Los Angeles
New York
I'm a hobo, I live wherever the train takes me.
In a cardboard box.

3. What is your financial status?
Filthy Rich
Rich
Comfortable
On Welfare
What's this money thing everyone's talking about?

4. What is your current occupation?
Corporate Whore
Whore
Whore who serves corporate whores
Auctioning off my children on E-bay
Auctioning my children to be slaves of corporate whores

5. What is your level of education?
College
College for the Mentally Challenged(AKA Junior College)
High School
Getting high in school
I has a good edumacation

6. How much time do you spend online each day?
24 hours
12 hours
1 hour
30 minutes
I have in ter net.

7. How old are you?
I was in the war... World War 1 that is...
I am very old
Older than you, sonny
I'm not old, I'm in denial. I'm Peter Pan! La la la la!
Ah crap, I always get this question wrong

8. What kind of music do you listen to?
Rock! (if you like limp bizkit and other crap bands that call themselves rock, there is a category down below for it.)
I listen to rap fool, I'm gonna come to your house and put a cap in your ass for dissing it
I, like, listen, like, to, like, N', like, Sync, like, my, like, I.Q., is like, 4
Wannabe, crappy rock that only assholes listen to (if you like limp bizkit or any of these kinds of bands, click here)
I am brainwashed... the government told me that my favorite music is patriotic music.

9. What country do you support?
America. I like to vote for old people who will make decisions for me. I also like the draft. It is fun to kill.
China. I like corrupt governments. I like to bribe cops and funnel money into my Swiss bank account.
Cuba. I like dictators. They shot my neighbors for saying "Fidel sucks". Heil Fidel!
Russia. I like democracy. It fucked my whole country up and now the government is killing civilians. Fun!
None. They all suck.

10. Do you actually think I care about what you put on this survey?
Yes, that way I can try to change this page into a major porn site
The Magic 8-ball says: "only time will tell." Wait, what kind of crap answer is that?
You might... if you are high on crack...
No, I don't think you give a damn about what I say... James SUCKS!
I clicked on the submit button and nothing happened

11. Where did you go in James's Webpage today?
I went no where but I tried to hack it on several occasions
I visited the entrance page before I clicked "leave"
I went to links page... to find better pages
I sent you hate mail
James's what page?

12. On a scale of 1-10 what do you rate this page?
I give it a 10. 10 is the lowest right?
It sucks so much it deserves a 1.
How about -3? Can I give your page a -3?
I can't even rate this page, looking at it makes me throw up more than Callista Flockhart
I'm not rating this... I condemn it to the depths of hell.

13. What did the webpage teach you about?
Drugs are fun.
Bunnies are cute.
My mom is a whore.
Rap is hip.
Government means order and I like government.

14. Will you be coming back?
Hahahaha that's a funny question... Hahahahaha
I'd kill myself before coming back to this hell.
No. You are mean and I don't like mean people.
Yeah, I'll come back... to kill you.
Hell no.